Blessings, affirmations, grace, and reflection

I just stumbled across the insta of someone I used to vibe with. This was during a time when I was deep into my spiritual practice. I would meditate and burn sage. It was when I lived in Brooklyn. I was on a higher spiritual plane. I also started attracting energies to me during that time. When I reflect back on that time in my life, I now see that the energy I was putting out was so much different than the frequency that I vibrate at now. I am operating on a low frequency and I have been for years. I actually attracted some really good energy toward me while I was operating on a higher frequency but it was blocked by someone who betrayed my trust and left me back where I started. Honestly, in retrospect, I think what really knocked me down was 9/11. I became depressed and that following year is when I entered my current career. My vegan lifestyle fell by the wayside, my meditation was infrequent, and my outlook was extremely negative and one of lack rather than abundance. I was angry ...

This time of the year I start to think about what's next. In case you haven't noticed, I get antsy every 5 years or so and I think I mentioned this already but I am coming up on my 5 year anniversary in 2018. I can't seem to stay content in this area for more than 4 years though. Financially I want to be secure. If I stick to my plan I can do it. Work is going to be the wild card. If I do well on my performance reviews I will looking at a $6K increase in pay over the next few years. Then the next increase will be $8K (unless we get retroactive pay raises which might make those numbers even higher.) However, if things don't work in my favor I am stuck at my current salary and will consider moving on. If I get that pay increase I imagine I would be "stuck" in this area for another 5 or more years. I can't imagine remaining in this field and making the same amount of money elsewhere. Even if the pendulum swings the opposite way I will have to take a pay ...

I used to do these memes(???) all the time. Tattoos.............. 0 Piercings.............. 3 Marriages 👰🏾 ........ 0 Proposals 💍 ....... 0 Children 👶🏾 .......... 0 Shot a gun 🔫 ...... 0 Flown on a plane..... all my life Watched someone give birth ..... 0 Watched someone die.... my mom but wasn't there when she drew her final breath 😥 Been to Canada  🇨🇦  ....... 0 Ridden in an ambulance  🏥 .... 0 Sang karaoke🎙..... Yes Have any scars 🗡..... Yes Last time you cried..... Good question. I might be overdue for a good cleansing cry Ever been drunk?....... Yes Rode on a motorcycle 🏍 ..... 0 Rode a horse  🐴  ....... 0 Stayed in a hospital 🏨 ...... Yes when I had a kidney infection Your turn!

This is the story of Petty Betty. You know her, you might work with her or maybe she is someone you went to high school with who always gave you dirty looks. Well, this particular Petty Betty is a coworker. One who is as shady and shifty as they come. A real snake. She tried to befriend me over the summer and when I ignored her attempts she turned on me. Twice now she has tried to play with my money because our regular time keeper is out on maternity leave. The first time she messed up my check by entering my time as leave without pay even though I had leave carried over from the previous year available. I told the principal and she had to reverse it. I knew then to keep copies to my leave slips but once again I made the mistake of not making a copy of a leave slip I submitted for a work day that had recently that was marked as other leave used so that we could have coverage (which I didn't have anyway.) She entered it as sick leave even though I marked the leave slip other leave u...

So I often wonder why it is that I don't "click" with others. Well, after all of this time I have come to discover that I am not vulnerable enough to connect with others. I keep everyone at arms length and keep all of our conversations on a really basic level. When I open myself up I feel stupid. Yet, this article might be my ticket to forging a new relationship! I am going to try to use these questions as ice breakers the next time I want to connect to someone.

I am really enjoying having extra days off to just relax. I had been sick before the Thanksgiving holiday and was trying to shake off a lingering cough so being able to just stay home and sleep, straighten up my apartment, and cook. I have a big pot of homemade chicken soup on the stove simmering right now. It is soooo good! I am going to prep my meals for the next week or two so my fresh food doesn't go bad. I have smothered chicken, baked sweet potatoes, basmati rice, soup, and I think I am going to make a pot of spaghetti to freeze in individual portions. I also need to cook up my kale and spinach. I also am considering prepping some breakfast foods so I can take them with me and eat them when I finally get hungry around 10:30 A.M. Yesterday I did all of my laundry that had piled up while I was sick except for my bedding which I will wash either today or more than likely tomorrow. I will probably also dust and vacuum tomorrow. Once I finish all of my cooking I will give my kit...

Forever young. That is how I feel. My life stagnated when I was 25. That was when my mother died. I am like the daughter Edie in Grey Gardens. Trapped in my mindset of being young and free. My high school graduating class celebrated 30 years. Everyone is sharing pictures of us in the prime of our youth. I reminisce about the cute boys who I used to flirt with and wonder where they are now. Some are dead, for various reasons. Some are locked up. Those who "made it" are just basic and ordinary. They work regular blue collar and white collar jobs. Some are grandfathers. Some have multiple wives and a string of children scattered across the state. I wonder what would have happened if I had just stayed home rather than decided to move across the country to purse my dreams. Would I have settled down with one of them? Had an ordinary life of working to pay a mortgage and raising kids? I don't regret my choice. I wanted the life I created. I never wanted the other life. But, ...