Blessings, affirmations, grace, and reflection

I am struggling to survive in a world that seems to want to see me down. I thought I was in a good place then suddenly the rug was pulled out from under me. I suddenly went from being amazing and blessed to being someone who doesn't matter. And it makes it more difficult because I am alone. I miss my family. I feel isolated from everyone. I don't have a network. I used to be able to bump into someone on the streets in NY and my spirit would be renewed but not here. I like living in this area. In this complex and apartment even but it doesn't feed my spirit. I don't have the human contact that I need. The human interaction that I need so I don't implode. Which I actually did on Friday. I have been holding so much in and building so much up and it was taking a toll on me in every way. I came home and decided that I am going to quit my job. I called my godmother and spilled my heart out to her about how I was feeling. I felt that it was futile. Instead of having a ...

I just want to dance tonight. I wish there was a club in my neighborhood where I could just dance - just spin in the middle of the floor while singing at the top of my lungs. All the clubs/bars around here are hip hop. I was so depressed this afternoon I didn't know what to do. I finally found a station playing dance music and was able to pull myself up. I think hip and R&B are killing us. Even thought the same songs and same beats are played over and over and over again, it is still better than the strip club music they play on the "black" stations. I know what club I can go to in D.C., but I would have to go all the way downtown to dance here. I feel so alive when I am dancing. I wish I could do it every night so I can feel alive. Dance the blues away!