Blessings, affirmations, grace, and reflection

While reading one of the many self-help/personal growth books that I have been reviewing, I came upon a passage that spoke about being shaped by what you wanted to be when you grew up. Well, I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. Whenever I would say what I wanted to be I was told that no, I didn't want to be that because I wanted to be (insert something else here.) Eventually I reached a point where I stopped wanting to be anything so I wouldn't be told that what I wanted to be was wrong. Whenever someone would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I simply shrugged my shoulders and said, "I don't know." That was my go to for many years. Finally when I was around 14, the work study program I was involved in invited a meteorologist to speak to us about her career. She was glamorous and charismatic and I instantly knew that I wanted to work in TV at that moment. From that day forward I set my sights on making that happen. Sadly, this same person who ...

Good Morning, I know it has been a while. Is anyone out there <echo, echo, echo>? [Blink if you are reading this.] Happy Earth Day! I've been a bit stressed out (what's new?) I have been on vacation all of this week and it was very much needed. I have been running on E for a while, both physically and emotionally. Things haven't improved at work so I have been job hunting. I currently have a few plans in place: Plan A: Stay at my current job for the next year to see if I can finally get my finances in order. Plan B: Change to a job nearby that will result in a pay cut. Plan C: I haven't figured it out yet. I am also dealing with an ailing cat. My baby is dealing with health issues, but she is being uncooperative about going to the vet. So, I have been making sure she is a comfortable as possible and that I try to stay close to home. Therefore, I haven't been anywhere in a while. But, during my time off I have been introspective. I had a stack of ...

1. Put your iTunes on shuffle. 2. For each question, press the next button to get your next answer. 3. You must write that song name down no matter how outrageous it sounds! 4. Tag 10 friends who might enjoy doing the game as well as the person you got the note from IF SOMEONE SAYS, “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY? Ama Be Happy - ArchDuke WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY? If your girl were humble - Aliyah mix WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL? PYT - Michael Jackson WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE? Butterfly WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO? Have Mercy on Me - Jengi Beats WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU? What about it WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? Cold Outside WHAT IS 2+2? Spaceship Number 9 WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND? Honey - Erykah Badu WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE? Good Morning - Lakey Inspired WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? Up 2 U - Jafunk and the Ninth Floor Funk Apt. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP? Blue Eye Stone - Zuper WHAT DO YOU THINK WH...

I didn't do anything to prep for the week ahead. I don't get off for vacation until the 22nd so I have to work all of this week and half of next week. Yesterday I woke up feeling refreshed. I got up and left the house before noon to run errands. I literally spent 12 hours out of the house. I was sore since I hadn't had a massage in ages and I had been running around all day so I got a massage. If anything the massage the made me feel worse. Today when I woke up I felt like crap. I felt like crap all day. I went to get another massage and it definitely helped. I hate missing my regular massages because this is what happens. Hopefully I can keep a regular schedule from now on. Anyhow, it was around 3 when I finally peeled myself up from my bed to go for the massage so I haven't done anything and my apartment is a wreck. I hope I get a boost of energy next week so I can clean up and cook. I will try to get to the grocery store tomorrow. I am thinking of preparing stu...

I stumbled upon this post today and it struck a nerve. Here I was thinking that I was the crappy friend and turns out that I have just been trying to protect myself from my army of crappy friends . Some of these you have witnessed right here on this very blog. Now, the tricky part is how will I find good friends? I seem to attract crappy friends/boyfriends repeatedly. What is a crappy friend? Try this checklist: Do you  feel bad or anxious  after you spend time with them? Are you more often than not,  arguing with them ? Do they  put you down  in a way that is destructive and not constructive? Do they try to  limit your opportunities ? Do they try to  isolate you from your friends ? Do they  resent your successes  in any way – or try to compete with your successes? Do they  not listen to you  as much as you listen to them? Do they  add drama to your life  instead of remove drama? And what is drama? It took me a...

There is a concept of being a bucket filler based on the book by Tom Rath called How Full is Your Bucket? I realized that my bucket is pretty empty. Why? Because no one fills it. On top of that, as part of my job I am constantly filling everyone else's bucket while they dip into mine. Last year, I would make it point to dole out compliments throughout the day. Sincere compliments. I also make sure to show my appreciation to others when they have done something...even if it was a small act of kindness. Yet, my bucket drains when people say negative things about me, no matter how supportive I am of them. The concept of being a bucket filler is that everyone has an imaginary bucket over their head. When someone does or says something kind it fills your bucket. When someone is mean or hurtful it empties your bucket. When you are kind your bucket should fill up...yet I think there is a huge hole in my bucket because no matter how kind I am my bucket continues to leak. I think my buc...