Blessings, affirmations, grace, and reflection

Sunny Side Up ~ Marianne Williamson joins Jessie May 02/18 by Jessie May | Blog Talk Radio Marianne comes on at about 30 minutes in. This is such an important reminder. I need to remember this every day!

I just heard this powerful spoken word piece by Jill Scott that blew my mind! It just broke me down when she said, "she's been degraded, exploited, not celebrated, saturated with self-hatred." That one line opened up so many old wounds. As a survivor of molestation and rape it hits home and the tears start to pour out involuntarily. It is not for the faint of heart. It is raw and real. That Ursula Rucker type of poem. That cerebral...make you think...make you feel it kind of poetry. You have been warned.

Why don't I know this song? Love it!

 PART 1 - MISDIRECTED ANGER Today was a lesson in human interaction. I spent the morning in the bank with the board that I just can't shake, setting up a new account. Everyone was in good spirits except the Queen. She came in with an attitude which we later found out was because we were told the wrong time to arrive. Well, I arrived early and didn't see anyone so if anyone should have had an attitude it should have been me. I just made the best of it by getting some breakfast then coming back an hour later. So, we begin to set things up and all kinds of questions and obstacles begin to crop up. By then she was completely frustrated and flew into a verbal assault on one of the members. It was so uncomfortable and pretty much sucked the air out of the room. We were already squeezed into a space that was not designed to fit us in the first place. Anyone who has read this blog for any amount of time knows by now that I do not like like conflict. Yet, I continue to be surrou...

Today I spent the day nursing an awful headache from a stressful week prior and reading articles about quitting a job. I wrote out a first draft of a potential resignation letter (I have a mid-year evaluation that I am feeling a bit uneasy about) and a list of the reasons why I need to move on. I burned some sage that had my entire apartment so smokey I thought something was on fire. I napped a restful, peaceful nap. My energy has shifted and my mind is now clear. I am preparing to go out into the snow. I need to pamper myself with a pedicure, dinner, a nice bottle of wine, and perhaps a movie. My money is really funny this month after having to replace my broken window, but I have to take care of myself. I also wrote out a 5 point plan for what I will do after I leave this job. It am excited! It includes cutting my hair, working out daily, and rediscovering my joy. Isn't it interesting how job and joy have  just one letter difference in them? Finally, I made a wish list of w...

I just realized this morning that I have been placed inside of a box. The box I have squeezed into is too small. I knew that the box was small from the beginning, but as time has passed I have outgrown the box. It was a good fit when I started out, but now it is uncomfortably tight. It is suffocating me! If I stay inside this box it will beginning to fall apart. There are already rips and tears forming. There have been many times in my life where people have tried to place me boxes where I didn't fit. Often, I have had advocates who have fought to get me out of those boxes. Now, I feel all alone. I feel like I have no one advocating for me. It is scary to step outside of the box. But, this box is cutting off my circulation. It is stealing my breath. I have to break out of this box.