Like Water

SHE LET ME GO😕

I think my counselor fired me. I think I mentioned that I wasn't really vibing with her after our first meeting. She told me that she thought I didn't need counseling anymore. As we all know THAT is not true. 😂  It never seems to work out when I do counseling and I haven't even scratched the surface of my deeper issues yet. In any event, I am going to take a break and seek out a real counselor through my employer next.

WHAT'S IN A NAME

I just discovered today that my name has a different meaning than I thought it did. It is a Quranic name for girls that is derived from the flow of a river, and the waves of the sea. I think that is so fitting since I've had this contentious relationship with water my whole life. Ironically water brings me peace. You would think I was a water sign the way I am drawn to water. 

FAUX FRIENDS

I wonder if I will ever find a friend who will accept me for who I am, flaws and all and without judgment. I guess that is someone I will have to manifest into my life. I feel like whenever I open myself up to others the ugly head of judgment rears its head. I have a colleague who claimed she was a friend but when I fed her some false information because I know she is a notorious gossip I saw her whole demeanor change. That told me all I needed to know about where she was coming from and where she is in her journey. I think it is sad that we can't trust each other and learn and grow from each other. I need to manifest the right people into my life. I still have hope that I will find someone who is the right friend for me, or that I will find the right tribe of friends for me. 

AGING GRACEFULLY

As I get older I worry about my health and well-being. I am trying to preserve my sexy (so to speak) but you can't fight nature. I thought I was going to let my hair go gray but I HATE gray hair. I mean, it looks good on some people but I hate it on me. I feel like it washes me out. I tried getting creative with it but I think I am just going to have to keep coloring it until it is more evenly distributed and I am ready to embrace it. 

WOMAN HEAL THYSELF

Not sure how much I have mentioned it on here but I had a health condition that I really wanted to resolve on my own because I know that the "solution" offered by medical professionals is always surgery and the surgery is not always long lasting. During the pandemic I changed the way I ate and too supplements. There is a noticeable difference in the issue and I am so grateful as it was something I knew I could control on my own but wasn't consistent enough to control due to day to day stressors.My next step is incorporating more exercise and releasing weight. Our first line of defense in caring for our bodies is diet and mindset. I was excessively tired this week so I rested when I could. Today I had a full to do list but my body said saddown somewhere and that's precisely what I did. I've slept off and on today but I am still tired so I am going to go to sleep early. I might be up all night looking silly but when my body says rest I am resting because I feel that it is the only way that we can truly heal our body.  There is a reason we go into comas when our body is unbearably sick. We can rest at home or go into the hospital and rest. As someone who made that mistake before I opt to rest at home. I encourage others to do the same.

With that said, I am off to bed. Good Night and sweet dreams. 💤💤💤💤