Escaping reality

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I haven't been writing. I also haven't really been doing anything that was previously part of my routine. I put myself on a budget this year so I have been taking it easy with my finances. Lots of trips to the grocery store to make sure I am not spending money on take out.

I have been feeling pretty well. Other than my dental issues. Work has been hell but I have been making the best of it. I think everything finally just reached a head and I have had two melt downs recently. I told my boss that she might want to start looking for someone else for my position. I was dead serious and I don't regret saying it. I have been set up to fail since I arrived and I called it as I saw it. I don't like to play games especially when it comes to my livelihood and my career that I am invested into for over a decade. I felt so insulted by the B.S. that she said to me when she knows I work my ass off and I have the data to back it up.

Oddly, I am not emotionally in the same place I was last year. I had a lot of anxiety, but I now have no fear about my future. I am just angry as hell.

This weekend I plan to buckle down and start trying to get myself ready to find a new job. I am going to start taking my shit out little by little so when it comes time to leave I won't have a lot to pack up.

I also need to figure out what I am doing about my living situation. Of course my rent is going up again. If I leave this job I don't know if I would swing the rent but I don't know where else I want to live and I don't really want to move. I hate moving which is why I was hoping I would settle into this job for at least a few years. But not if I am going to be treated the way I have been since I have been there. I think a book is going to have come out of the experiences that I have had since I have been here.

I have also considered where I am moving next. Canada? Cali?  But like I said, I really don't want the expense or the trouble of moving again.

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