Can I go out to play?

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Some behaviors have been ingrained since childhood. For example I never feel "right" about going out to have fun when my house is not clean. Not that my apartment was filthy but it needed some TLC. When I was a child our weekly routine was to get up on Saturday and clean up before we headed out of the house. When my friends (who had the same routine) would come over to see if I could out to play my mother would tell them "no" because I had to finish my chores. I am the same way as an adult. Today I got up and started my chores. I knew how free it would feel to be able to go outside after to enjoy the gorgeous spring weather. But something deep inside just wouldn't allow me to go out until I finished my all of my chores. There are days when I literally will stay in the house all day because I am too lazy to finish (or start!) my chores. I feel like I don't "deserve" to go out to play. Well, now my chores are pretty much finished so I am going to head out with my camera to enjoy what is left of the afternoon. I am so worn out though that I just want a nice relaxing massage! Ah, the irony!

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