He is gone

I am still processing the loss of MJJ. As many have already said, he was like a first love. Mike was 10 years older so technically he was too old for me, which is why I think I crushed on the younger brother Randy. But who didn't want to be part of such a talented brood?

As time passed and Mike because more reclusive and eccentric folks gave him the side eye, but deep down in our hearts we really truly loved him like a relative. He was a part of our lives for our whole lives. The year they played the Apollo was the year I was born. My first LP was ABC by the Jackson 5. The first album I bought on my own was Off the Wall. When I copped Thriller my girls and I sat on the porch and sang every single song! When he was burned during the taping of the Pepsi commercial we prayed for him.

I argued with the neighborhood kids who claimed they were his cousins. My own cousin only wanted black high water pants, white tube socks, and Hush Puppy penny loafers for Christmas one year. I longed for a zippered MJ Jacket and sparkly glove. I wore a button of him on my senior sweater and slow dragged with cute boys who like to grind to the beat of "Rock with You." And when they broke my heart I cried to the tune of "She's out of my life."

Oh yes, MJ was there during every stage of my life. His quiet spirit will be missed miserably. As for the rumors of his past-- I guess we will never know for sure at this point. We are left with questions, concerns, and a whole library of amazing music.