Note to Self

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Selena J. is truly a blessing to my spirit. Terrence first made me aware of her "ministry" and it seems like every time I tune in to her radio show this sister freely offers some words of truth that touch me deeply.

This week her message was one passed along from her pastor "the more you feed the flesh, the more you starve the spirit." That one statement spoke volumes. I was conversing with one of my friends earlier this week about how I have embraced bad behaviors that include seeking solace in food, alcohol, sex, and other diversions that ultimately feed the flesh but leave the spirit malnourished. The reality is that it is so much easier to satiate those desires than to go straight to the source and feed the spirit. When we try to take the easy way out we ultimately walk away still feeling empty inside. Our spirits are starving for love and peace.

As my regular readers know I have been going through some struggles where I have been seeking a peaceful place in my life. Sometimes I feel like I am just inches away from where I want to be and other times I feel like I am nowhere near my final destination. I've had this burning desire to be successful for as long as I can remember, yet I also have a notoriously bad habit of sabotaging myself just as I am about to reach my goal. Fear of failure? More than likely fear of success and all that comes with it. I have sabatoged success with my weight, my education, my careers, my relationships, my finances...honestly, if it weren't for angels who have been strategically placed throughout my life I would have completely destroyed my future by now.

I know what needs to be done, it is just a matter of doing it. Monday will be the first day of spring, yet I have been dragging my feet by doing the bare minimum to stay afloat. I know what I need to do make my life better and although taking one step at a time is a great start, eventually I know I will need to move beyond the baby steps to take a giant step forward. I know that everything I desire is within arms reach...all I have to do is grab ahold and not let go. Spring is the perfect time for new beginnings. Here's to making dreams come true.

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